How to turn advice-seeking into self-propelled solution finding

Have you ever noticed how when a friend comes to you for advice it seems like they are not open to it? They start to tell you their story and when you offer suggestions they respond with “No, that won’t work...” or “Well, I thought of that but...” This can be frustrating because you feel … Continue reading How to turn advice-seeking into self-propelled solution finding

How to balance trusting your partner with having their back

I was sitting on the couch watching Dave awkwardly pulling two bottles out from the liquor cabinet to reach for one behind. Our floors are ceramic. All I could see was the two bottles slipping from his hands and exploding onto the floor. It is clearly my superpower to see these events happening. Melissa: Would … Continue reading How to balance trusting your partner with having their back

Self IMPROVment: lessons learned from IMPROV class

When I started to talk to people about the improvisational theatre class that I was taking – they inevitably asked: Do they teach you how to be funny? Well, no, not really. It is mostly a series of games that you play that provide a framework to set creativity free and allow a scene to … Continue reading Self IMPROVment: lessons learned from IMPROV class

Are you missing out on an opportunity for awesomeness?

For many mornings Dave and I had a version of the following conversation. Dave <pulling open the door open of the fridge> “Are you going to eat the leftover chicken for lunch?” Melissa <sitting at the kitchen table, in my bushy brown robe, glasses and pyjamas pen in hand drinking my morning tea> “Maybe”. Dave … Continue reading Are you missing out on an opportunity for awesomeness?

Should we take time to focus on fancy problems?

I mentioned to my mom that I was reading Self Matters by Dr. Phil after a big break up in 2007. I felt a little guilty about my pursuit for self-help because I sensed that she felt slighted. “But you are doing great – why would you need to read a self-help book?” she said. … Continue reading Should we take time to focus on fancy problems?

Tenets for living well

Here is the list of tenets that I came up with while I was reading the The Happiness Project: Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun by Gretchen Rubin. Don't gossip Be specific Just leave it Pause before … Continue reading Tenets for living well

How to cultivate happiness – what I learned from Gretchen Rubin

It took me a long time to pick up the The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin because I feared it would be the book that I would have liked to have written.  When I first I saw the robin’s egg blue book in the book store at Mount Sinai Hospital in Toronto in 2009,  I … Continue reading How to cultivate happiness – what I learned from Gretchen Rubin